I hesitate...but trying to make myself accountable....

Haven't stuck to my goal since my last post on 9/11. I am actually 3 lbs up from then. No one to blame but myself!

It is funny...when I tell people I still need to lose about 30 lbs they always gasp then laugh & either ask me where I plan to lose another 30 lbs or they tell me I will  blow away if I lose another 30 lbs.

I know these people are trying to be supportive when they say these things, but they really don't realize just how destructive those comments can be. They give me permission to be complacent...to not follow my plan & eat things I shouldn't. Then before I know it I am up 3 lbs making my new goal 35 lbs left to lose. 

Then I see a friend at work who had her WLS this summer & is doing amazing, I see a post from my cousin on FB with updates from her WLS (she is down 75 lbs), another post from a cyber friend on FB who had her WLS 3 months after me modeling her new size 6 clothes, & then a phone call from a previous co-worker who will have her WLS next week asking for my advice & what to expect after she wakes up from surgery...little do they know how much they inspire me!!!

I had a good lifestyle day yesterday & today I walk into work armed with a water bottle, lean protein, & clean socks to don so I can walk on my breaks today. Here I go again...thanks for the inspirational kick in the butt guys!

Feeling really good!!!!

Ok so that whole getting back on board thing from July didn't last very long...busy lives & the fact that I am truly NOT a get up at 4am & exercise type of person reared its ugly head & threw me off course!!!!

My weight slowly started creeping back up...not enough that anyone else noticed, but I definitely did!!! 

Sunday, September 1st, I stepped on the scale & it screamed 189 at me...my first thought was "Oh hell no!!!!" That day I pulled out all my previous WLS diet knowledge & started to apply it to my life again...

Even though I am missing the simple pleasure of picking out a bag of chips & a soda from the vending machine at work, I am proud to say that the pounds started melting away faster than they creeped on. By Thursday, Sept 5, I went for my 2 year WLS check up. I was down 7 lb to 182. Yippee!!!!

While at my check up, I met with the nutritionist. Since my goal is still to get down to the 145-150 range. She suggested I go back to the active weight loss stage of the WLS diet 400-600 calories a day. No more than 200 calories per meal, at least 20 grams of protein per meal & no more than 5 carbs per meal...yes you read all that right!!!!

I think it is funny when people tell me they would die if they had to eat like that...my response is "not when your stomach is the size of an egg!!!"

I am happy to report that this morning I stepped on the scale & saw 178.9! Double yippee!!!!!! So as of this morning I am feeling great about myself again! 

I have started making myself get out of my cube a couple of days a week & move my booty around the parking lot on my breaks...I wish it was more often, but I will get there. It never fails, my boss always wants to have a quick meeting as soon as I put my tennis shoes on! Hahaha!!! That is about as committed as I have gotten on the exercise front. I plan to add more eventually. I did buy a kettle bell, just never seem to go motivated enough to use it yet...I will get there!

My goal is to hit 150 by New Years!!!!

No New pics of me, but I will share a couple of my beautiful children!!!

Kayleigh & her bestie Mikah at her first sleepover!!! She is getting too big too fast!!!

Morgan on the first day of school!!! We are gonna have to beat the boys off with a stick! She has her first real boyfriend this year!!!

  

1st day of Exercise...back on board...

This was my view as I finished my 4am 2 mile walk...really wish I had had the time to walk a little longer & enjoy the rest of the sunrise. So obviously I got up early and got in a workout...yeah me!!!

Did great food wise today, not quite in my 600-800 calorie range suggested by my doctor to actively lose weight, but I was under 1000...which is better than the 1200-1400 I have been consuming. Not to mention I burned about 540 cals through exercise today! 

Didn't get my entire 64 oz of water in but did get 48 oz which is better than my usual 24!

Tonight I decided to pull a work out from Pinterest...

I only accomplished the first 2, but gonna go for it again in the morning & see how far I can get. After all practice makes perfect.

By the way, I was down a total of 1# this morning after my workout!

Back on Board.....

So I have definitely been doing my own thing for about the last 6-9 months. Out loud I called it maintaining, but really I was just being lazy! I had been fluctuating on the same 5# eating pretty much what ever I wanted, just in much smaller portions. I told myself it was great that I could eat what I wanted & be able to "maintain"...boy was I deluding myself!!!

About a week before our vacation the last week of June I stepped on the scale to find out I was 10# up from my lowest weight...momma was NOT happy. So I tried being really good for a week, down about 3# & then tried to be really careful on vacation. Figured that along with being careful the extra walking at Disney that surely I would come home lighter than I left...so not true, I was up about 5# when we got home.

While sulking during the week after vacation, I read the post of a cyber friend on facebook who had her surgery 3 months after me. We started of at pretty close to the same weight & this week she hit the goal set by her doctor...155#. I was so jealous, for a split second I wanted to throw my phone across the room!

So today was day 1 of getting back on board. I didn't meet all of my goals I had set for myself, but I did meet the biggest goal, which was not cheating on the no carb issue. The were several times I was tempted:
1. Finding a half eaten single serving bag of lays potato chips that belonged to Kayleigh in my purse when I went to lunch...I gave them to Clay so I wouldn't continue to be tempted.
2. Finding a stray starburst in my purse during lunch...gave that to Clay too!
3. Picked up pizza & cheese sticks from Little Ceaser's because it was easy & what Bug wanted for dinner. The cheese sticks smelled so good in the car, that I nearly drooled on myself, but I didn't sneak anything!

I had planned to get up & either go for a walk this morning or do ab exercises...but I slept late! I had planned to take my breaks at work either go outside for a walk or work out in our mini workout room...worked straight thru both breaks as usual. I had planned to get all of my water in today,I very rarely do...but I only drank about 25 oz today.

Guess I will work on those goals again tomorrow along with continuing the food battle! Say a prayer for me, that food one has always been my downfall!

Now that I have gotten all that off my chest I just want to say how proud I am of my cyber friend Christie! We have never met or even spoken on the phone, but I understand what she goes through everyday & I am truly proud of her & super excited for her on reaching her goal weight!!!! My next follow up appt is September...hoping to be past this stall I have been in and a little closer to my goal by then!